Look at what the Apostle Paul says, “Husbands go all out in love for your wives. Don’t take advantage of them.” Colossians 3:19, The Message. The Amplified Bible puts it this way, “…be affectionate and sympathetic with them, and do not be harsh, bitter or resentful toward them.”

As a Pastor I have discovered this about marriage relationships:  All LOVE IS LEARNED!  This really is profound because it means that no matter what our family background is we can plow new ground by incremental steps of obedience.

Husbands here are four ways you can show affection to your mates:

By Your Words
Every wife needs a steady diet of compliments. Think of creative ways you can affirm her by what you say. Proverbs 18:21 says, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue:  and they that love it (to talk) shall eat it’s fruit.” (NASB)
Compliments that highlight her beauty and behavior will empower her to lift her head high, keep going in the challenges of life, and at the same time bring her deep fulfillment!

By Your Actions
The exchange of positive behaviors is the key determiner of marital happiness. Mutual happiness is the glue to a fulfilling marriage.  In fact, it is said that for every one negative interaction there needs to be seventeen positive actions.  Wow! Lets get to the practical doing side of caring for our wives!

James 2:22 (NIV) says, “You see that his faith and his actions were working together, and his faith was made complete by what he did.”

By Your Touch
Some of the most sensitive nerves are in our hands.  A light touch to your mate’s shoulder, arm, leg or neck is a powerful means to demonstrate affection. Men, each day make it your aim to touch your wife before you leave for work, right before you go to sleep, while you pray together out loud, at the dinner table, while you are watching TV and at countless other moments throughout your day. Husbands, take the initiative!

By Your Focused Attention
One of the most significant reasons couples drift apart is because they start to live their lives separate from each other. Of course we need individual time, but when we start living a lifestyle of individual activities separate from one another, your marriage will suffer. It’s as simple as that.

Exchanging eye contact, face-to-face communication, turning off the TV, and sitting down together in moments where it’s ‘just the two of you’, are practical ways that you can give focused attention.

Husbands ask your spouse: “What are ways that I can demonstrate affection that you enjoy?” Listen to her response and begin to act today.

Next Week I will address women specifically as to how they can meet the most important need for men-(physical intimacy).

Steyn, Mark. America Alone. p. 10

In Mark Steyn’s book, America Alone he does extensive research on the demographic changes in our world.  According to Steyn; “as fertility dries up, so do societies. The single most important fact about the early twenty-first century is the rapid aging of almost every developed nation other than the United States.”  The replacement fertility rate—i.e., the number you need for merely a stable population, not getting bigger and not getting smaller–is 2.1 babies per woman. America is just at 2.1 percent and only so because of our Hispanic population.

Some countries are well above that.  The global fertility leader, Niger, is 7.46; Mali, 7.42; Somalia, 6.76; Afghanistan, 6.69.  What do each of these nations have in common? They are all Muslim!

It is amazing that God instructed His Covenant people to keep multiplying and fill the earth.  He not only desired that we physically populate the earth but that we would be carriers of His truth to the whole world. The easiest way would be to have enough people to carry that message just like the Muslims are presently doing.

Once again the wisdom of Yahweh God from the book of Genesis has radical application and profound implications for us today!

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Tonight I arrived home after a long day of discipling men. The best way for me to summarize my experience is found in Jeremiah 15:16: “Your words were found, and I ate them, And Your word was to me the joy and rejoicing of my heart; For I am called by Your name, O Lord God of hosts.” (NKJV) There is something truly magnetic about God’s Word and I count it pure joy to open the Scriptures with men and learn from the Lord together.

Sitting across the table from me tonight was one gentleman who said, “You know Dale, you ought to attempt to answer the challenging questions I hear every day from my ‘not-yet-Christian’ friends.”

I am discovering that the men I associate with ask incredible questions that are scientifically inquisitive, culturally challenging, and investigative in nature.

Here are a couple of questions this gentleman asked me tonight:

Tony, (a police officer) told us of the tragic case where a mother and her boyfriend were accused of murdering their three year old daughter. John asked, “Dale, do you believe in capital punishment?  If God is truly a God of love and grace why would he desire to put anyone to death? Suppose it was your son or daughter that committed a crime that deserved death. Would you sentence them to death? I just don’t know if I could do that.”

I proceeded to lead these guys to the Scriptures where we examined God’s Word together.  More and more I’m trying to allow a process of self-discovery, as the Spirit of God prompts me to ask specific questions? Would you know what passages to take them to if asked about capitol punishment?

Here are a few that we looked at:

Genesis 9:6 (NIV) “Whoever sheds the blood of man, by man shall his blood be shed; for in the image of God has God made man.”

This was the establishment of capital punishment, administered judicially by man representing the civic authority to maintain order in a given society. It has never been changed or withdrawn. It is still God’s law today, and forms the basic authorization of the institution of human government.

Exodus 20:13 (NIV) “You shall not murder (premeditated and intentional slaying).” Personal revenge carried out in murder is never justified but killing is allowed when carried out by the authority of government, in war or in self-defense.

Leviticus 24:17&19&20 “If anyone takes the life of a human being, he must be put to death.  If anyone injures his neighbor, whatever he has done must be done to him: fracture for fracture, eye for eye, tooth for tooth.” This powerful principle is simply this; the punishment should fit the crime, but not go beyond it.  The false notion going around today is, “If ‘eye for and eye’ and ‘tooth for tooth’ is true, then we all will be eyeless and toothless.  This is one of many phrases used by people that wish to minimize Christian truths.

In Matthew 5:38 Jesus made no alteration to the true meaning of the law in Leviticus. Christ was referring to our response to personal retaliation when confronted because of our witness by those outside of Christ. Jesus taught his disciples to personally return good for evil.

Romans 13:1-5 reveals the New Testament’s affirmation of the authority of government to carry out justice. “For he (government) is God’s servant to do good.  But if you do wrong, be afraid, for he does not bear the sword for nothing. He is God’s servant, an agent of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer” Romans 13:4. The primary role of government is to protect the people so they can live productive lives without the fear of evil.

In Acts 25:11a, the Apostle Paul affirmed capital punishment for himself when he was on trial before Festus, “If, however, I am guilty of doing anything deserving death, I do not refuse to die….”

Once again the New Testament and the Old Testament are in harmony when it comes to the principles and practices for followers of Christ and for societies.

So would I send my child to death for the crime of murder? Well God is completely loving and altogether just. He has given authority to the rulers and our children are to be in submission to the rules and authority of the land. It really is not my choice and I personally don’t have the power or authority to sentence someone to death.

God’s DESIRE, of course, is never to see someone be punished. He would rather us live free of sin and it’s consequences, but He also will not intervene with our choices. We are free to choose but we are not free to choose the consequences of our choices.

You will find this article archived after this week under “Topical Articles” in the blog, “The Truth about the World.”

Figuratively speaking, we each have a Love Bank. It contains many different accounts, one for each person we know. Each person either makes deposits or withdrawals whenever we interact with him or her. Pleasurable interactions cause deposits, and painful interactions cause withdrawals. Two love banks are open for business in marriage.

1 Peter 3:7 (ESV) says, “Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.”

Most people would never consider pursuing a career without gaining knowledge of that particular field of work. Yet when it comes to marriage we fly by the seat of our pants without proper training and in many cases retraining. The simple command in 1 Peter 3 has huge ramifications.

Men and women make a study of your mate by discovering his or her needs. Work rigorously to fill your mates love bank by making direct deposits!

Deposits like words of affirmation, focused attention, consistent eye contact, touching and smiling, praying together out loud, holding hands, complementing each other privately and publically, listening and being attentive to each other when talking, opening up the Word of God together, and regularly engaging in healthy interactive conversations are ways that you can be sure your emotionally well- being will flourish!

One of the benefits of unselfish love is that eventually you begin to eat the fruit of your righteous actions. Enjoy each othe this is your companion for life!

Remember James 1:22 (ESV) “But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.”

Next week I will address the most significant need for women!

In an age when nationalism and patriotism are being under-minded by the “progressives”, this Bible will equip you to be able to speak with others and integrate God’s truths in the public arena.  You can find this Bible at Costco (if they have not sold out) or at www.americanpatriotsbible.com.

Let me give you a sample of this instructive Bible. On page 1368, under the verse

1 Timothy 4:12 “ …in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity.”

The author quotes John Adams demonstrating the importance of

MORAL STRENGTH:

“Statesmen…may plan and speculate for liberty but it is religion and morality alone which can establish the principles upon which freedom can securely stand. The only foundation of a free constitution is pure virtue, and if this cannot be inspired into our people in a greater measure, than they have it now, they may change their rulers and the forms of government, but they will not obtain a lasting liberty.”

I was at that the pharmacy the other day picking up a prescription for Linda Lee, and as I was done with the transaction the young man said to me “Hallelujah!” I asked, “What did you say?” He said, “I said Hallelujah!” I then asked him “Do you know what that means?” He said, “Well I think it means have a good day.” I smiled and said, “Actually Hallelujah is a Hebrew word found in the Bible and especially in the Book of Psalms. It means ‘Praise the Lord God.’ It is a command to declare the character of God out loud. You just told me to Praise God!”

“Really I never knew that?” he said. I said, “Thank you very much… that’s just what I will do. God and Jesus Christ are good, kind, just and faithful.”

Friends, I’m not sure if this is how we change our culture or make a lasting impact on people for Jesus Christ, but I do know if we open our mouths to speak for God we can make a small difference.

Like Psalm 51:15 says, if we open our mouths perhaps the Lord will speak through us!

As I was leaving we were both smiling and he said,  “Hallelujah” and I said “that is just what I plan to do”.

Genesis 1:27 (KJV) “So God created man in his own image in the image of God he created him; male and female created he them.”

Today I was reading a book titled, America Alone by Mark Steyn. In it he references that in 2006 Spain’s ruling Socialist Party introduced a bill in parliament legislating that apes be included in “the category of persons, and that they be given the moral and legal protection that currently are only enjoyed by human beings. The party’s argument was that human Spaniards do, after all, share 98.4 percent of their genes with chimpanzees, 97.7 percent with gorillas, and 96.4 percent with orangutans.”[1]

When I taught the first eleven chapters of Genesis, I talked about how a correct understanding of Genesis and our origins has a bearing on how we view the world. The above reference is a case in point, not only for an individual but also for a country.

Even if humans are 97% genetically alike with chimps, (and this percentage is not without debate), the remaining 3% difference contains over 50 million different genetic differences. These dissimilarities clearly set men and apes apart genetically. What also delineates men from apes is that fact that God created man in His image! This means that man has the capacity to worship, consciously commune with God, has moral consciousness discerning right and wrong, and possesses an eternal spirit.

The legislation in Spain might have been far different if followers of Christ in Spain would have understood and spoken the truths of Genesis long before it got to the point of making a law that takes a low view of mankind and an exaggerated view of the animal kingdom.

(Check out next week’s article of the contemporary importance of the oldest mandate given to God’s Covenant people)